The Great War
by whitecrossgirl
Summary: "This means war Pendragon!" "Bring it on LeFay!" Arthur and Morgana decide there is only one way to decide who is superior - by having a prank war. Natuarally Merlin and Gwen are dragged into this mess too. There's just one rule: there are no rules.
1. Declaration of War

**AN: Set around series1-2 before Morgana went evil.**

It should be put down on record that Arthur and Morgana had a relationship of ups and downs; the way most siblings do.

When they got along; everything was fine.

When they didn't get along; all hell broke loose.

Today was one of the latter and in one of the corridors of Camelot castle; Arthur and Morgana were yelling at one another. What had started as Arthur boasting about the recent tourney he'd won had turned into an argument over who was the most sly, devious and clever. Arthur claimed it was him; having being raised in battle strategies and warfare. Morgana claimed she had inherited her devious mind from her father and as a woman was born with a sense of deception and slyness. It seemed the only way they would settle their differences was through a prank war. They were not alone; their servants; Gwen and Merlin were standing aside. While Gwen was doing her best to stay out of it; Merlin was offering insults or comments to annoy or assist both sides of the row.

"This means war Pendragon!" Morgana yelled.

"Bring it on LeFay!" Arthur retorted.

As both stalked off to their respective chambers; Gwen and Merlin shared a look before following. Something told them that this was no idle threat; that Arthur and Morgana were willing to literally fight it out to prove their superiority.

"What are you planning to do?" Merlin asked.

Arthur paused in his pacing and grinned. "It's best to start small and build up on the attack bit by bit. We'll have to keep it simple; something she'll never suspect." Arthur replied as he resumed pacing.

"We?" Merlin asked.

"Of course; I'm ordering you to help me." Arthur replied while muttering about whether a bucket on top of Morgana's door or the classic sending false love letters would be the better plan.

"I don't think-"

"Exactly Merlin, you don't think. If I lose this prank war to Morgana; what does that say about me as a leader? No man will believe I can lead them to victory in a battle if I cannot defeat the king's ward in a simple prank war. The implications and outcomes of this war are vital to Camelot's future.

"Uther will go crazy when he finds out." Merlin reasoned.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt us. Besides Morgana would never go crying to him no matter what we do. Now help me work out our plan." Arthur replied as he finished pacing and grabbed a roll of parchment and a quill. Merlin cast his eyes skyward. This was his supposed destiny?

"Gwen I need you to help me. Arthur will never suspect you if you did this." Morgana insisted.

"I'm not sure this is wise my lady. A prank war just seems childish, doesn't it?" Gwen asked. Morgana looked at her friend as through she'd grown an extra head.

"There are more than just a few pranks at stake here Gwen. You know how arrogant Arthur gets if he beats one of his knights or a stranger in anything. What will he be like if he wins this war against us? If Arthur wins the war he'll be completely unbearable and we'll have to live with the knowledge that his arrogance will be because we backed down and I'm not sure about you but I wasn't raised to give into anyone without a fight. Now are you with me?" Morgana asked.

Gwen looked at her friend and nodded. They were going to be in so much trouble for this but Arthur's arrogance was not something to be enjoyed and the threat of knowing she was responsible for it was not something Gwen wished to experience.

"Alright; what's the plan?" Gwen asked.

**AN: What do you guys think? I'm not too good at thinking up pranks so all ideas will be welcomed. Happy New Year, let's make 2012 unforgettable!**


	2. Signs of the first attack

**AN: Thanks for the reviews and story alerts. Like I said before; any suggestions that you have, no matter how childish will be welcomed.**

War was officially declared the next morning. Merlin and Gwen, in an attempt to try and prevent the inevitable trouble/chaos/disaster had tried their best to try and talk Morgana and Arthur out of the war. However neither prince nor ward was willing to listen. The declaration of war came with the first attack.

Morgana woke up early the next morning feeling on edge. She'd had another one of her dreams. She couldn't explain it or remember it that well but there was a woman in it. A woman with blonde hair whom Morgana had felt a connection with; someone she could trust. Morgana shook her head; it was still quite early. Morgana lay back onto her pillows and tried to forget her dream. She needed something to focus on.

Then she remembered. She was at war with Arthur and it was vital that she struck first. Not just because it would allow her to have the upper hand but 'Ladies First' was proper etiquette after all. The prank had to be something clever, something devious. Morgana looked around for inspiration as Gwen arrived with her breakfast. As Morgana ate; she hit upon an epiphany. Arthur would be expecting her to pull something big as a first attack therefore he would not be expecting something childish like…

"Gwen I have a plan."

"I take it you're still going through with this immature war?" Merlin asked as he delivered Arthur his breakfast.

"I told you before; it isn't childish. It's about superiority." Arthur replied. Merlin rolled his eyes as he set out Arthur's clothes. "And don't forget my stables need mucked out."

"Yes Sire." Merlin muttered sarcastically as he fetched Arthur's chainmail. Once the prince had dressed, he went to train with his knights. Arthur walked through the corridors, trying to figure out how to prank Morgana. He needed to be clever, sly and the prank had to be something humiliating to remind Morgana that he was a prince and therefore superior to her. Arthur was lost in his thoughts and didn't see Gwen until they collided and fell to the floor.

"I'm so sorry Sire; I didn't see you." Gwen apologised as she helped Arthur get to his feet.

"It's fine Guinevere," Arthur replied. "Should I be worried about Morgana?"

"I'm staying out of this Sire. It's between you and Morgana." Gwen said. Arthur studied her for a moment but walked away. Gwen smiled to herself as she hurried back to Morgana's chambers.

"Well?" Morgana asked.

"I did it. We just have to wait." Gwen answered.

Three hours later Arthur returned from training in a foul mood. There was something wrong with his men. They had been sniggering like a bunch of schoolboys throughout training but none had refused to tell the prince just what was so amusing. The strange state of hysteria had continued as he walked around the castle with guards barely concealing their laughter with coughs and maids giggling like young girls. When Arthur reached his chambers he studied his reflection. There was nothing on his face or clothes that would prompt such strange laughter. For the life of him, he couldn't figure out what was wrong with everyone. Maybe they were all under a sorcerer's spell.

"Now I'm sounding like Father, that's all I need." Arthur muttered as a foul smell reached his nose as Merlin entered the room having mucked out the stables.

"Anything else that," Merlin trailed off as he tried to hold back his own laughter and snorting. Arthur spun around and glared at Merlin who hurriedly tried to compose himself.

"What is it that everyone seems to find so funny?" Arthur demanded. Merlin walked over and pulled something off Arthur's mail and handed it to him. It was a piece of parchment with an arrow pointing upwards and Morgana's handwriting on it.

"_Camelot's biggest idiot."_

Arthur crumbled the parchment into his hand. He hadn't seen Morgana all day so how did she manage to- no, it wasn't Morgana. She had masterminded the childish prank it but Guinevere had been the one he'd walked into and who had 'helped' him up. She must have attached it then. Arthur stormed out of his room and headed for Morgana's chambers. As he neared it, he could hear Gwen hissing a 'He's coming!' to Morgana as he pushed open the door.

"Arthur, what a pleasant surprise." Morgana said politely. Gwen was keeping her gaze on the floor she was sweeping but there was a grin forcing its way onto her face.

"Really Morgana? A sign on my back? Is that the best you can do?" Arthur demanded.

"Of course not Arthur. You're Camelot's biggest idiot, not me. I'm just getting started." Morgana warned.

"Well just be careful. The second you let your guard down is the second I strike." Arthur warned and walked out of the room. Arthur was trying to plot his revenge. Morgana had taken the first, albeit childish, attack of the war. He needed to retaliate and quickly. Since Morgana had decided their pranks were to be something childish. Arthur was going to strike back with something even more childish.

It was time for him to get his hands dirty.

**AN: Yes I know I did a variant of the 'kick me' sign, how crap. I doubt many would have dared give Arthur a kick up the backside, well Merlin would relish the chance but that's because he's Merlin.**


	3. The Great Dress Treasure Hunt

**AN: Thank you so much for the reviews and suggestions; I'm glad everyone's enjoying this. Sorry I haven't updated in a while but January has been totally hectic with exams and university interviews. I hope you guys like this; this prank was suggested by Princess Aziza, Morganaforever and Ardaia La fata.**

By the time Arthur had returned to his chambers; he had formulated his payback prank to be pulled on Morgana. The plan was very devious and clever if he did say so himself. Arthur walked into his chambers and began scribbling notes onto some parchment, muttering under his breath as he did so. When Merlin walked in after washing and changing his clothes; Arthur had had his plan finalised and actually smiled at his servant.

"Merlin, I am a genius." Arthur boasted.

Merlin bit back a smartass answer and instead asked; "And why is that?"

"I have already formulated my revenge on Morgana for her prank. It's clever, underhanded and possibly one of the smartest ideas I've ever had." Arthur boasted looking at his plan. Again Merlin had to bite back a smartass answer. Sometimes Arthur just made it too easy. Merlin looked at Arthur expectantly.

"So what is this brilliant plan of yours?" Merlin asked. Arthur walked over to Merlin and glanced around the room to make sure neither Morgana nor Guinevere was spying on them. He looked at Merlin conspiringly and explained his plan in a whisper.

"Are you mental?" Merlin demanded.

"What do you mean by that _Mer_lin?" Arthur snapped, putting emphasis on the first three letters of Merlin's name that only he did for some unknown reason.

"Well firstly if Uther found out he would go insane. Secondly the idea is just creepy and thirdly Morgana will literally kill you!" Merlin replied. Seriously as soon as Arthur dismissed him this evening, he was going straight to Kilgharragh and demanding the stupid old dragon choose someone else for his supposed Great Destiny.

"No she won't." Arthur dismissed and clapped a hand on Merlin's shoulder. "She'll kill you."

"Oh no; I am not taking part in this stupid prank war! Find someone else to do it!" Merlin insisted.

"I order you and because I am your prince you have to obey. Besides Guinevere is helping Morgana therefore you have to help me." Arthur replied and turned away, missing the fish impression Merlin was doing behind his back.

As night fell over Camelot, Gwen bade Morgana goodnight and went home. Morgana took her potion and climbed into bed. She hoped her dreams would stay away but throughout the day she had been thinking about the blonde woman in her dream. There was something about her, Morgana just couldn't say what it was but there was something that made the woman seem so familiar to her. It was like they had met once, many years ago but she had forgotten about it until today. Morgana rested her head against her pillow and drifted off to sleep.

Merlin swore under his breath as he walked up from where Kilgharragh was kept. Stupid ancient pain-in-the-backside dragon had no advice for the warlock. Instead the old git just laughed and told him to get on with the prank war.

"_I heard that young warlock." _

Merlin walked on and headed back to Arthur's chambers where the prince was waiting on him. Merlin obediently followed Arthur's orders and they headed for Morgana's chambers.

When morning came, Gwen was walking up to the castle when she noticed something unusual. Lying on the ground underneath Morgana's window was a pile of fabric. On closer inspection it turned out to be three of Morgana's dresses. Gwen picked them up and hurried inside. Morgana was still asleep but it looked like she wasn't having a nightmare. Gwen shook her awake and Morgana rolled over. It was too early to get up.

"Arthur's pranked you!" Gwen said. Morgana shot up.

"What?" Morgana snapped. Gwen gestured to the clothes in her arms and Morgana looked at her wardrobe. The door was hanging open and the wardrobe was empty. Morgana climbed out of bed and swore. Every last piece of clothing she owned aside from the nightdress she was wearing had vanished. Morgana turned on her heel and headed for Arthur's chambers. Arthur was still asleep when she stormed in and pulled the quilt off him.

"Shove off," Arthur moaned nestling into his pillow.

"You're a sick immature brat Arthur Pendragon!" Morgana snapped. Arthur sat up and smiled innocently.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Arthur replied innocently. "However if you're here to admit defeat then I'll gladly accept."

Morgana scowled at him. "I'm just getting warmed up. You will pay for this!"

With that she turned and walked back to her chambers, ignoring the looks she was receiving. On returning to her chambers Morgana looked at the dresses which had been thrown out of the window. They weren't too dirty; Morgana idly dusted off one of them and pulled it on. For over an hour Gwen would reappear with various amounts of clothes. It seemed Arthur and Merlin had scattered the dresses all over the castle and grounds. Some were in various chambers and a few had been put into the stables. It had been a wild goose chase all morning for the elusive dresses. However it was they had done with her underdresses which really riled Morgana. Arthur had put them into the chambers of various knights such as Sir Leon and Sir Michael, no doubt in an attempt to get her into huge trouble with Uther.

"This is awful. He is so going to pay for this!" Morgana muttered as she paced around her chambers.

"I think you're going about this the wrong way." Gwen commented as she divided the clothes into what needed cleaned and what didn't. Morgana spun on her heel and looked at Gwen.

"What do you mean?" Morgana asked.

"You can't retaliate," Gwen replied.

"What are you saying? That I give up and let Arthur win?" Morgana asked.

"No, you didn't let me finish. I'm not saying you shouldn't prank him back. I'm saying you should wait a while. Say for the next week or so you act like nothing wrong. There's no war, no pranks instead everything is like it was before. Make Arthur think you've given up." Gwen explained.

"I see where you're going with this. I prank him when he least suspects it! That's genius. Wait, I thought you believed this war was childish?" Morgana asked with a smile.

"That was before I had to clean dung covered dresses." Gwen replied, bundling up the dresses and walking out of Morgana's chambers. Morgana thought about what Gwen had said. The idea had potential. If she went out of her way to be extra nice; even if Arthur pulled another prank on her then it would really unnerve him. It would also make her next prank all the sweeter.

But the prank war ran into troubles of its own over the coming days. Morgana's dreams suddenly became stronger and stronger and her magic began showing itself. It led to the reunion with Mordred and the fiasco with the Druids. The subsequent actions meant that Arthur volunteered to have a ceasefire, at least until Morgana recovered. But before the prank war could get started again Gwen had been kidnapped by bandits trying to get Morgana and reunited with Lancelot. Arthur and Morgana and Merlin had to put their differences aside as Arthur and Merlin went to bring Gwen home. It was only after Gwen's kidnapping did Morgana restart the war.


	4. Water Water Everywhere

**AN: Thanks for your reviews; I think this prank would be so Morgana as it's devious, wicked and humiliates Arthur. **

Wednesday afternoon found Morgana and Gwen sitting in Morgana's chambers having a nice long complaining session about men. Morgana was frustrated by Uther trying to control every aspect of her life and Gwen was venting her frustrations over Lancelot's disappearing act after escaping Hengist after all that transpired between them while she was posing as Morgana. Inevitably Morgana's complaining turned towards Arthur and as she complained; she suddenly remembered something.

"The prank war!" Morgana said.

"Oh yes, I'd almost forgotten about it." Gwen replied with a wan smile.

"I still haven't gotten Arthur back for stealing and scattering my dresses around the castle. I need to get him back, but how?" Morgana asked, as she got to her feet and paced around her room. Different ideas came to mind but she cast them aside. Too difficult, too predictable, too time-consuming; she needed something wickeder than Arthur stealing her clothes as she slept.

As she slept…

Of course! She was thinking about pranking Arthur when he was awake. The perfect time to strike would be when he was at his most defenceless. When he was asleep. Arthur could sleep like a log in every situation. He once managed to sleep through a storm so fierce that the wind blew in his windows.

"Gwen I think I know when to prank Arthur but I'll need your help." Morgana insisted.

"Actually; I might sit this prank out. After Arthur and Merlin helped me; it doesn't feel right to repay them with a prank." Gwen replied. Morgana tilted her head slightly, as if to determine whether or not Gwen was lying to her but shrugged.

"Alright; just this once but if he retaliates and he will; then you have to help me. Agreed?" Morgana asked.

Gwen nodded. "Agreed."

For the rest of the evening Morgana plotted and planned. She knew she would strike when Arthur slept but there was a whole range of possibilities. Obviously she wasn't going to copy his prank; she could do better. Morgana would do better. Eventually she decided on a prank. It was going to be one so brilliantly brilliant; pranksters would be copying it for centuries to come. She needed to wait however.

Darkness fell over Camelot and Arthur was fast asleep in his bed; he was sprawled over the mattress with the duvet kicked off and was snoring loudly. His loud snores were an indication to how deeply asleep he was. Morgana smirked to herself as she slipped into his room and crept over to his bed. This was so cruel. Balancing the bowl with her hands, Morgana prodded Arthur a few times but he didn't wake up. One of his hands was hanging out of his bed and she knelt beside her target and raised the bowl she carried in her hands; ensuring that Arthur's fingers slipped into the warm water. It didn't take long for her prank to take hold and upon seeing the spreading stain across his sheets, Morgana got to her feet and hurried out of Arthur's chambers and back to her own. Morgana climbed into her bed and giggled to herself as she thought about her prank and how Arthur would react. As she drifted off to sleep; she didn't even have one of her dreams.

"MORGANA YOU ARE SO DEAD!"

Morgana could only laugh as Arthur burst into her chambers; his face scarlet and the front of his trousers stained. Arthur held her bowl in his hands and flung the remaining water over Morgana's face. Morgana leapt out of bed, water dripping off her face and hair as she and Arthur glared at one another. Morgana glanced at Gwen who had her fist pressed to her mouth; clearly holding back laughter and at Merlin who was doubled over and holding his ribs trying to stop himself from going completely hysterical.

"Do you think this is funny?" Arthur demanded looking at the three of them.

"Considering you're an adult and you wet the bed; it's quite funny." Morgana said and her glare turned back into laughter.

"You'll pay for that one Morgana. I didn't mind the sign but this is more humiliating. You're an immature silly little girl who's fighting a war she can't win. I'll get you back for this." Arthur warned.

"For what Arthur; I didn't do anything." Morgana denied with a faux-innocent tone. "Oh wait, I did. And it's you who should just give up and surrender. You're a good prankster Arthur but I'm better."

"We'll see about that. Merlin, fill my bath and clean my sheets. Now!" Arthur demanded. As he turned away his eyes caught Gwen's and his face turned red for a different reason and his hands jumped to cover the stain. "Guinevere."

"Arthur," Gwen replied; her voice muffled by her fist as she attempted to restrain her laughter.

"Troll." Arthur spat at Morgana.

"Dungbrain." Morgana retorted.

As soon as Arthur slammed the door behind him, Morgana and Gwen fell to the floor laughing hysterically. For the next few minutes the women attempted to compose themselves but fell back into laughter. Finally Gwen got to her feet and wiped the tears of laughter from her eyes.

"That was so wicked." She commented.

"Thank you," Morgana replied proudly.

"Don't say a word Merlin." Arthur warned as Merlin stripped the sheets from his bed.

"I wasn't going to say anything. However if you want my opinion," Merlin replied.

"I don't." Arthur interrupted, Merlin ignored him.

"You should aim a little higher. The dress thing was good but Morgana's pranks are becoming more devious." Merlin explained. He was being slowly drawn into this prank war. Sure each prank was most likely bringing them closer to being caught and punished for acting so immaturely but the temptation; the lure of trickery was becoming too strong to resist. Back in his childhood in Ealdor; he and Will had terrorized the village by pulling prank after prank after prank. They were the good old days. Merlin missed Will; he was Merlin's only friend in Ealdor and the only one aside from his mother who knew the truth about his power. Merlin knew that if Will was here with him at this moment; he would have been pushing Merlin to get more involved with the prank war. Their motto which they recited before plotting and executing each prank rang in his head and it was something he relayed to Arthur as they plotted how to get Morgana back for the water bowl prank.

"What's the worst that could happen?"


	5. Epilogue

**AN: I'm really sorry but I just completely hit a block with this story. I initially only started it after I was working on evening and began imagining Morgana and Arthur having a prank war. However it was harder than I thought to maintain the flow of writing various pranks up and therefore I'm finishing the story here. Thank you all for your support and reviews; I really do appreciate all of them.**

It's strange how so much can change in so little time. One day you're laughing and plotting various pranks and the next your whole world is turned upside-down. Everything which you viewed as a constant was mixed up together and nothing was the same again. It wasn't like making a dress when the stitches could be undone and you could start again, no, it was like when you're mixing a potion; once it's done then it can't be undone. You can't just spilt it up and take back a certain ingredient. Suddenly up was down; right was left; good was evil and it seemed irreversible no matter how much you wanted it to. It couldn't.

That was Gwen's train of thought as she stood alone in the dark passageway outside the dungeons. So much had happened and it was hard to make sense of it all and for some unknown reason, she thought about the prank war. How she and Morgana would laugh as they brainstormed various ideas on how to prank Arthur and how he and Merlin would retaliate.

After the water bowl prank; Merlin got more involved and he and Arthur pulled off a sensational prank wherein Merlin swapped Morgana's potion for a potion which caused on to experience visions making for an incredible few days of Morgana either claiming she could fly or was seeing unicorns.

Morgana fought back by bribing seven different servants to tell Uther that they were having Arthur's baby.

Arthur and Merlin staged a classic booby-trapping of Morgana's room with the full works. A bucket of slime on top of the door; dung in her bed, her wardrobe rigged to splatter honey and feathers on whoever opened it.

That looked to be the winner of the war however Morgana and Gwen pulled off the best one of all. It was simple yet completely brilliant. Morgana knew full well that Arthur had fallen for Gwen and therefore the prank was for Gwen to tell Arthur that she was pregnant; Lancelot was the father and he was returning to Camelot so they could elope.

However that was the last prank of the prank war. Uther was aware of the war and decided to let them have a bit of fun yet when the 'lady' Catrina came to visit he told them to behave. During the whole Troll incident they all set aside their differences and offered Arthur support when Uther disowned him under the troll's magic. After that disaster there were the visitors from Hell in the form of the witch finder; the bounty hunter; Princess Vivian as well as Morgause. The end result was Morgana's disappearance as well as the releasing of the dragon. With Morgana gone it seemed like there was no point to carry on the war and instead the three of them became closer friends and Arthur and Gwen began their secret relationship.

Then Morgana returned and they all thought things would be back to normal. Little did they think that Morgana was basically pulling the biggest prank of all. As Gwen stood alone; she had to wonder when did Morgana change? Was it over the course of the year she had been with Morgause? Did it begin beforehand? How was she able to keep the wool over their eyes for so long? Now that Morgana had the power, Camelot had been plunged into darkness. Uther and the knights were imprisoned; innocent people had been killed by Morgana and Morgause; Leon was due to be executed any day now and there was no trace of Arthur or Merlin nor any of Gaius or Elyan who had fled with them. Hope was the only thing Gwen could hold onto now; hope that she and Leon could escape and help Arthur take back the kingdom. Gwen even still hold onto a little bit of hope for Morgana; that maybe the real Morgana; the morgana they knew was still inside her somewhere. It was possible right?

"Gwen what are you doing? I told you to leave an hour ago!" Morgana snapped as she and Morgause walked down the passageway.

"Sorry my lady," Gwen replied. She never referred to Morgana as queen. As much as she hated Uther; he was still the king. Morgana however let the name pass and simply walked on; neither she nor Morgause gave her a backwards glance. Gwen however turned and hurried off; a method of escape just revealed itself to her and it was a long shot but it was all she had. She couldn't hold onto hope anymore; playtime was over and it was time to take action.

Morgana may have won the prank battle.

But she was not going to win this war for Camelot's future.


End file.
